


one big mandatory field trip

by Avonya



Category: Dimension 20 (Web Series), Not Another D&D Podcast (Podcast)
Genre: 3rd person pov, Canon Typical Violence, Crossover, Gen, M/M, Post naddpod finale, friendship!, just want them to meet okay, post fantasy high sophomore year, we got TWO gay clerics gang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:00:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,219
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24122491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Avonya/pseuds/Avonya
Summary: It’s definitely Arthur Aguefort’s fault that the Bad Kids are fighting three stone golems by themselves.It’s probably Arthur Aguefort’s fault that they get saved by two extremely powerful halflings?(It was supposed to be a fun day. The Bad Kids were supposed to be at school, technically, but they had all planned on skipping when they saw the soft warmth that the day was shaping up to be. Aguefort literally holding the door open as they sneaked out probably should have been a warning sign but everyone rolls bad at insight sometimes, yeah?Sometimes everyone but Gorgug gets a critical failure. Statistically wack, yeah, but whatever! And the nice day behind Aguefort was so inviting!)
Relationships: Beverly Toegold V/Erlin Kindleaf, The Bad Kids - Relationship
Comments: 10
Kudos: 67





	one big mandatory field trip

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! NADDPOD finale both saved and killed me and drove me to write fic for the first time in a while. Spoilers for all of NADDPOD and for fantasy high sophomore year. 
> 
> If you haven’t listened to NADDPOD (though you should! It’s got murph and Emily and it’s incredible!) but you’re still reading this, everything you need to know about those characters will be explained in the fic.

As far as fights go it was _not_ a good one. 

See, Riz has seen some bad fights. Some seriously _bad_ fights. Hell, all of his friends except for Fabian have fully died, some more than once. They’ve been knocked unconscious more times then he can remember (possibly because of the head trauma. Only time will tell!) and have had countless broken bones. Between the six of them Riz is sure there’s not a bone gone untouched, though his death definitely got most of them. 

He still aches from it sometimes, phantom pains echoing from across the darkness before the revivify. But that’s for another day. 

It was supposed to be a fun day. The Bad Kids were supposed to be at school, technically, but they had all planned on skipping when they saw the soft warmth that the day was shaping up to be. Aguefort literally holding the door open as they sneaked out probably should have been a warning sign but everyone rolls bad at insight sometimes, yeah? 

Sometimes everyone but Gorgug gets a critical failure. Statistically wack, yeah, but whatever! And the nice day behind Aguefort was so inviting!

So they walked their merry way out into the grassy field beside the bloodrush field. The grass was just about ankle high on Riz which was just outdoorsy enough to be exciting but not enough to be inconvenient. Riz had enough of wild forests to satisfy any ranger and he was a detective, thank you. But this was a good grass. So green, so gentle, so inviting. This grass was what grass was meant to be. 

As they walked the grass got higher and higher; rising from about ankle height on Riz to calf height, knee height, waist height. It was weird. It was really weird—

3\. 6. 

Sometimes grass was just like that, huh?

Conversation died as they walked further until finally whatever force was pushing them on stopped pushing, and the six of them stood, blinking haze from their minds and wondering what was powerful enough to charm an elf. 

And then the fucking mage showed up with three (3!) stone golems. Large, lumbering, creatures, they easily dwarfed even Gorgug and Fabian, and they were built solidly with sturdy gray stone. One was painted with bronze sigils, one with silver, and one with something shifting and arcane blue. 

At least the grass was high enough to hide in, Riz thought. And at least all of them were paranoid enough to carry all their weapons on them always. He loaded his gun again as he waited, low on his haunches, for the combat to roll around to his turn. 

The mage had fucked off after Riz shot them. It was a good hit, too, first crit in a week or so plus sneak attack. The mage leaving meant the Bad Kids didn’t need to worry about an evil someone with fireball in a field full of grass but it also meant they had absolutely no idea what was happening and where any of them were.

That would be a problem for them if they could make it out, Riz decided. He watched as Fabian got hit with one, two stone fists, nearly knocking him off his feet. His sheet was wound around his fist and his handsome face was twisted slightly, tightened by anxiety. The golem with the bronze markings loomed over him, readying itself to attack again. Fabian threw out an arm to balance himself and prepared for another hit. 

Riz’s pulled his gaze away from Fabian to focus on Gorgug and his fight. He had taken a couple hits but had raged pretty early on so he was doing alright. The golem with the silver markings had focused on him just like the one with the bronze focused on Fabian. 

The silver golem swung at Gorgug again and caught him easily. He was learning how to better take hits, not how to dodge them. At least he didn’t look too bad. 

Fig, though. Fig was looking _bad_. It was a bad fight. 

The golem that was covered in whatever the blue stuff was had been targeting her for some reason. It hit her with the slow spell almost right away and then it landed hit after hit after hit—

Another one. Fig went down. Riz bit back a curse. 

Kristen didn’t. “Oh, fuck! Should we run?” Her curved staff was clutched tightly in her hand and her face was creased with anxiety. “This seems kind of— kind of impossible, guys.”

Hovering just out of range of the golems, Adaine nodded. She held out her hands and cast a giant fireball, the flames twisting and dancing in her hands for a second before crashing down directly on to the blue golem. It made a sound that was almost like a hiss and almost like a scream as stone shifted and chunks of rock broke loose. The blue on the fallen rocks lost their glow which probably meant something but Riz couldn’t focus on that— it didn’t turn from Fig even when Adaine did some solid fire damage. 

“We need to regroup and find out,” Adaine began. And then she stopped. 

It was always kind of worrying whenever Adaine did her oracle thing. It was fine when she went looking for the information herself, but whenever the gods saw fit to just put it into her head she looked like she was in pain. 

Adaine assured Riz that she wasn’t. She said it felt weird, yeah, and sometimes it gave her a headache, but really it wasn’t so bad. Riz doubted that but didn’t push it. 

Now, though— Adaine _screamed_ , something guttural, and clutched her head as her blonde hair lifted around her face. She laced her fingers over her eyes like she was trying to keep the blue arcane glow from slipping out. It leaked through the cracks between her fingers and spilled over the battlefield, something vibrant and terrible and wonderful and dangerous. 

It was like she had stopped everything with her scream. Even the golems paused, the bronze golem dangling Fabian from a tightly closed fist, the silver golem winding up a stone hand to smack Gorgug, the blue golem hovering just above Fig’s crumpled, bloody, form. 

“Oh,” Adaine said, finally, and everything swung back into motion. The bronze golem slammed Fabian into the ground, the silver golem swung at Gorgug (and missed, hey!). Riz sprung from hiding and shot the blue golem in one of its empty eyes. 

It would go after Fig again if they weren’t careful and it would kill her. Riz needed to distract it, that was all, then Kristen could bring her back up and everything would be fine and great and they could run. Riz dashed forward and ended his turn right above Fig, crouched protectively over her body. 

Kristen cast a healing word on Fig, shouting for her to get _up_ before calling towards Adaine, “What was that? Are you okay?”

Fig took a shaky, rattling, breath below Riz. She had a dazed look on her bloody face and Riz was pretty sure that one of her horns was shattered but she was up and she could run and that was all that mattered. 

“Fuck,” Fig breathed. She looked up to Riz and gave him a crooked thumbs up before looking up, further, at the golem standing over them both. “ _Fuck_.”

Even further, above Riz and Fig and the terrible blue golem, Adaine called back, “Yeah.” She was smiling a little, at least Riz thought she was. He couldn’t really see her, the angle was awkward; though he was pretty sure her brows were creased with thought. “Yes, we’ll all be okay.”

“Ominous!” Fabian shouted. He twisted free from the bronze golem and slashed at it with his sword. His first attack skittered right off the smooth stone surface but the second buried into one of the cracks. The golem groaned and Fabian laughed triumphantly. 

And then someone called out from over the hill. Riz could hear Adaine laughing with something like relief and something like hysteria and could only imagine what her facial journey was.

“We’ll be okay,” Adaine said again, sounding like she couldn’t believe it. Then she cupped her hands around her mouth and screamed for help. 

Whoever had called out before answered, shouting that they were coming. Riz twisted to face the sound and saw their apparent saviors: two halfling teens in full plate, cresting the hill with surprising speed. 

One of the halfling teens had wavy brown hair woven with flowers and was holding a _wicked_ sword that glowed softly white and had wings sprouting from its hilt. He outpaced the other halfling who had longer, curlier, red hair and a normal sword. 

Cool sword kid leapt into the air and smacked into the blue golem with his cool sword. Waves of light burst from it and pieces of stone fell from it in waves erupting from where he hit. The second attack struck the golem in the chest and it moaned lowly as chunks fell. With just two hits the golem already looked nearly on death's door. 

“Are you okay?” Cool sword kid asked. Riz was a little taller than him which felt fucking _ridiculous_. 

“Who—?”

The blue golem swung down twice on their apparent savior but he easily rolled out of the way. 

“I’m Beverly!” He— Beverly, apparently— called cheerfully. “Anyone need healing?”

“I’m extremely fucked up!” Fig said. She pushed herself up onto her knees before staggering into a standing position. 

The other halfling got to her before Kristen could and helped her stand while casting some kind of high level healing spell. The effects were immediate: her cracked horn pulled itself back together, new chunks growing in where they had fallen, and the steady drip of blood from her temple stopped. 

“What’s going on?” Kristen asked, coming up to where the four of them already stood. 

Fabian called something that sounded like “what is happening,” from where he was being beaten into the dirt. 

“We’re tourists!” Beverly said just as cheerfully as before. “Erlin, can you—”

“I got the healing, babe,” The other halfling, apparently Erlin, said. He looked to Kristen. “Are you the healer?”

The blue golem tried to hit Beverly again with one of its stone fists. It groaned like it was disappointed when Beverly dodged and then swung around and smacked—

God damn it. The blue golem crashed its fist into Riz’s head for _so much_ damage. He staggered and nearly dropped his gun. 

“Uh, yeah,” Kristen said, eyes skipping from Erlin to the golems to the blood dripping from Riz’s head. Her face creased in what looked like a quick prayer to Cassandra before she nodded. “I’ll get Riz if you can get those guys,” she pointed to where Fabian was pulling himself out of the dirt. The only clean thing on him was the sheet and that was only because of the crazy elven sheet magic on it. 

Erlin nodded and ran out of golem smacking range. Riz saw him start to channel a healing spell before looking away. Whoever these “tourists” were could be dealt with later. They needed to try to not die first. 

The battle was swung firmly in their favor once Beverly and Erlin arrived. For one, both were healers, which took some pressure off of Kristen. But probably more importantly the two halflings were _incredibly_ powerful, especially Beverly. Whenever Riz saw Beverly in his peripheral vision Riz saw echoes of something bigger surrounding him, something both radiant and necrotic and bursting with power. 

The fight was over quickly. Fig got the last hit on the blue golem which looked incredibly satisfying while Beverly knocked the other two golems down to something that Fabian and Gorgug could finish off. And then it was done. 

The eight of them settled down into a loose circle on the grass, beaten, bloody, and tired. Well. 

Adaine was fine, she got out of range of the golems before they could act. Beverly and Erlin looked great. 

“I can tell that you two aren’t from this plane,” Adaine said, looking between Beverly and Erlin with slightly narrowed eyes. “So why are you here? And why did you help us?”

“Should I cast zone of truth?” Kristen asked. Her crooked staff was leaning across her lap. It was long enough that it wasn’t just in hers, but Riz’s, too. He didn’t mind, though. 

“Oh!” Beverly exclaimed, sounding excited. “What does your zone of truth look like?”

“Babe, most people don’t make a couch,” Erlin said, his voice filled with an amusement that only came from old run arguments. 

“Are you flirting with me?” Kristen asked, eyes narrowed. 

Beverly went red. 

“No! Oh my god, I wouldn’t—”

“Because I’m super gay, and I have a girlfriend, and—”

“I have a boyfriend, I would never flirt like—”

“You’re super powerful and just saved us so there’s kind of a big power difference, right—”

“I’m not, I wouldn’t, that’s—”

“And that’s also a super weird come on! So—”

“Crude—”

“Stop!” Adaine clapped. She must’ve done some kind of spell because the sound echoed all around the field. Riz winced. 

“I wouldn’t be flirting with you because I’m in a relationship and also I’m gay,” Beverly said, once the sound settled enough that he could speak. He pointed at Erlin who waved and put an arm around his shoulders. 

“Oh,” Kristen said. “Hey, we’re both gay clerics!”

“Hell yeah,” Erlin nodded solemnly. “Gay clerics.”

“I don’t think we’ll need to cast zone of truth,” Adaine said, desperately trying to pull the conversation back to order. 

Riz could relate. “Why are you two here?” Adaine smiled at him gratefully. 

Beverly only looked confused. “I already said that we were tourists, right?”

“That’s not helpful,” Fig crossed her arms and leaned into Gorgug. She had been healed back to full but being knocked out can take a lot out of a person. Occasionally she would reach up and tentatively run her fingers over where her horn had cracked but otherwise she kept her hands on her bass, positioned to play. 

“My friend Moonshine cast dimension shift and sent us here,” Beverly said. Adaine mumbled that that _wasn’t a spell, what the fuck_ , and was ignored. He frowned and looked back to the pile of stones that remained of the golem. “We heard there was cool technology here, we wanted to see if we could bring anything back to Bahumia. I think something went wrong, though, this doesn’t feel like the right place.”

Erlin nodded at that. “It feels almost like a pocket dimension, or a prison dimension, or something.”

“Do we need to do some wizard bullshit?” Fabian groaned and slumped into Gorgug’s other side. Gorgug patted his head. 

Adaine held out her hands, curling and twisting her fingers to manipulate shifting blue light. Some kind of detection spell maybe? 

Riz wasn’t great at magic stuff. He didn’t need to be since all the Bad Kids _but_ him could do at least a little magic. Maybe he should learn though, could help investigations. 

Adaine frowned and the magic knotted and twisted around her fingers dissipated. “I think you’re right, Erlin. That would make sense. It felt _weird_ coming here, didn’t it?”

Riz nodded. “How do we get out, then?”

“Wizard bullshit, probably,” Beverly said. He looked to Adaine. “Do you think you can get us out? We can try to help, but—”

“I don’t have plane shift,” Adaine said, almost a whisper. She looked down at her hands. Boggy formed on her open palms and she hugged him close. 

“That’s fine!” Fig said. “We can find another way out. Either of you been in a planar prison?” She asked the halflings, leaning forward with a joke on her face. 

To Riz’s surprise both of them flinched. Erlin nodded. 

“How’d you get out, then?”

“I broke it from the outside,” Beverly said.

Fig swore. “That’s how we always get my dad out, when he gets stuck. Hey, do you think if we play some kind of rocking concert we can burst out?”

Gorgug considered it. He nodded with a gravity that was entirely unearned, and pushed himself to his feet. Fabian fell into the grass and swore at him. 

“Why are we even here in the first place, though?” Kristen asked. She looked around, watched the idyllic clouds roll over idyllic scenery. “We haven’t pissed off anyone in a while, right? What makes us so important that we get trapped with three stone golems?”

“Maybe it’s a test,” Riz said. “Is this a junior year thing?”

Aguefort held the door for them, after all. But that could’ve been unrelated. 

Behind them Fig started setting up her bass. Gorgug settled next to one of the larger pieces of golem and pulled out his drumsticks. Beverly watched the action by leaning over Erlin’s shoulder with what Riz thought was amusement but he was rolling like shit so it could’ve been anything. 

“If it was a test then why would Beverly and Erlin be here?” Adaine asked. 

Kristen twirled her staff in her hands and regarded the halflings. “Maybe it’s because of them? Erlin, have you guys pissed off a god recently?”

Beverly twisted back to face her. “Yeah, but we killed her, so I don’t think it’s that.”

Fig and Gorgug launched into Burn Towns Get Money which absolutely didn't match the mood that had abruptly settled over their little thinking circle. 

“You killed a god?” Kristen asked. 

“She killed my god first,” Beverly said, like that explained everything. 

“Okay!” Fabian clapped. “Unless that’s related then we can talk about _that_ later. And unless Fig and Gorgug can rock us out then we need a plan. The Ball?” He turned towards Riz who valiantly did _not_ blush because he didn’t have a crush, shut _up_ , Fig. 

“I don’t have magic, why would I—”

“Because you’re the one with the plans, the Ball, so—”

“Nope,” Adaine cut them off before any more overlapping arguments could start. “We’re not putting this all on Riz, Fabian, that won’t help. Do we have any way of contacting anyone outside? Maybe Ayda?”

“Fig!” Kristen called. “Can you call Ayda?”

“Yeah!” Fig called back, cutting herself off halfway through the chorus. Gorgug kept going. 

A pause. 

“No service!”

“Do the wizard thing, then!”

“Right!”

Fig took an exaggeratedly deep breath before shouting, “Ayda Aguefort! Ayda Aguefort! Ayda Aguefort!”

“Is that a thing?” Beverly asked. 

“Ayda is a really powerful wizard,” Adaine explained. “And she knows when Fig is calling for her. Unless…”

They waited. No sign of Ayda and her fiery power blasting a hole through the sky. 

“Maybe she’s busy,” Kristen said. 

Fig’s face fell and she stomped back to the circle they had gathered in. She pointed at Erlin, her nail sharpened to a point and painted red. “Clerics have plane shift! Take us back!”

“I don’t have it prepared,” Erlin said, hands up. “We’d have to wait a day.”

Fig threw her hands into the air and swore. And swore. And swore. 

“Okay, Fig,” Adaine said, reaching out with a gentle hand. “Let’s settle. Here, take Boggy.”

Fig begrudgingly sat down. She held out her hands for Boggy and once Adaine had gently placed him, pulled him close to her chest. “I don’t want to be here another day,” she said. “What that mage comes back and remakes the golems? We can’t fight them forever.”

“There was a mage?” Beverly asked. 

Riz nodded. “They ran when I shot them, though. Maybe we could find them? Get them to take us out?”

Adaine shook her head. “I felt them leave this place. God, we should have known.”

“Hey, don't blame yourself. We should’ve done a bunch of things.”

“Maybe I can reach out to Moonshine through the fungal network,” Beverly said, acting like that was a sentence that made sense. “If I could speak to her through different layers of Hell, then this should work, right?”

“I’m not even going to ask,” Kristen said, waving a hand. “Unless we have to long rest here. Then I will ask.”

“Do you need anything?” Riz asked. 

Beverly frowned. “Maybe some mushrooms? It normally doesn’t need any components but this place is strange, so.”

“Well!” Fabian stood and clapped. “That’s something I can do. Let’s find some fucking mushrooms.”

Riz suspected that Beverly could grow his own mushrooms but didn’t say anything. It felt good to help. 

Gorgug found some mushrooms first and raced back to their rapidly despondent circle, Fabian hot on his heels with mushrooms that he exclaimed were “better in every way, seriously.” According to Beverly both sets would do great. 

Beverly took a fistful of mushrooms in each hand. Riz watched, fascinated, as he crushed one handful and smeared it over his face. The other hand he held close to his heart. 

At some point all six of them had settled back into their circle. The seating arrangement had changed slightly, and it was really more a semicircle facing Beverly and Erlin; Riz sat next to Adaine and Fabian rather than Kristen and Adaine. Fig leaned into Adaine’s other side and held Gorgug’s hand with the hand not on boggy. Kristen spread her staff out across her and Fabian’s legs and they watched and waited.

At last, Beverly’s face broke into a wide smile. “She heard me. She’s coming.”

Riz sighed a full body sigh and fell against Adaine. Fig whooped and high fived Gorgug, her fear forgotten, as Fabian exclaimed some kind of rich boy joy expression as Kristen cheered. Adaine smiled so wide that it changed Boggy’s expression from ‘something’s not right’ to ‘all good here’. 

There was a sound like fabric tearing and the bright blue sky split open revealing, well. An equally bright and blue sky, but a different one. In the distance Riz could see their school and it was wonderfully familiar. 

Less wonderfully familiar was the sigh of Aguefort arguing with a tall half-elf man. He was possibly the buffest man Riz had ever seen. He was impossibly jacked. Muscles on muscles. It was crazy. 

Directly in front of where the pocket plane had ripped was an elven woman. She was covered in mushrooms, some stuffed into pockets and woven into her hair and some just sprouting from her skin. She was wearing overalls with no shirt underneath and she had, well—

“Damn,” Kristen whispered, staring at her. 

Adaine smacked her. “Don’t sexualize Beverly’s mom!”

“Moonshine isn’t my mom,” Beverly hissed. “But please still don’t—”

“Youngin’s!” Moonshine exclaimed. She rushed forward and pulled Beverly and Erlin into a hug. “I was so _worried_ when you didn’t come out the other side! This fucking _arch mage_ had y’all _kidnapped_ for a _team building_ lesson. Bev, Erlin, you boys alright?” She pulled away from the hug to start prodding their faces. She nodded approvingly at the smears of mushrooms all over Bev and started to add more. 

“I’m fine, Moonshine,” Bev said, pushing at her slightly. She didn’t budge. “Moonshine, meet these cool guys that I met,” he pointed towards the Bad Kids. 

Okay. It felt _kind_ of cool to be called cool by someone who had killed a god. That was cool. 

“Oh Melora, isn’t this a nice looking bunch of youngins! Pleased to meet you, I’m Moonshine Cybin.” She finally let go of Beverly and Erlin and held out a mushroom covered hand for a handshake. “I’m so sorry that your principle is a piece of shit, that’s real unfortunate.”

After they went through their basic introductions, Adaine tentatively pointed to where Aguefort and the man were fighting. It had escalated to physical fighting because of course it had. The man was swinging at Aguefort with a massive hammer and Aguefort was making mirror image after mirror image, cackling with every double that was created and with every double that was destroyed.

“Principle Aguefort?” Adaine called. “What’s going on?”

Aguefort teleported away from the man, appearing in front of their assembled group in a puff of purple and silver smoke. “Aha! You’ve completed your test!”

Riz had never felt so validated. “It _was_ a test!”

“And you passed with flying colors! I knew that it would be important to see how you interacted with people from other dimensions and you reacted wonderfully. One day this alliance will come in handy and all of you will appreciate this introduction! Aguefort out!”

And with that, despite everyone’s protests, he vanished in a burst of flame that scorched the field around them. Expertly spell shaped around everyone except for the buff man, of course, who grunted and tried to cover it. 

“Well,” Beverly said, staring at the place where Aguefort had vanished from. “That was…”

“Something we should have expected,” Adaine sighed. 

“Well, if we want to get full credit on this assignment, we shouldn’t just end this party here, right?” Kristen looked between each of the Bad Kids and Beverly and Erlin. “Do you two wanna see Elmville?”

Riz watched the buff man go to introduce himself and be stopped by Moonshine who simply smiled and shook her head. She looked to Beverly and appeared to communicate something wordlessly because he grinned and nodded. 

Beverly took Erlin’s hand. “Show us the way!”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! Leave a comment, they are my food and my fuel. 
> 
> I’m sort of on tumblr, also as avonya. Go say hi and if I remember to check I’ll say hi back!


End file.
